Letting Go

I saved the pendent of the hearts,

The one you gave me in july,

And those old emails in my inbox,

I would still read them and cry,

Over the last year,

I’ve had many painful days,

And it may cause some more tears,

But it’s time to blow them away…

Oh,

Letting go…

There’s nothing in my way now,

Oh letting go…

I feel like I can fly,

And even though,

I’ll never forget everything,

I feel so happy,

That I’m letting go.

With the flick of a button,

You’re out of my life and my mind.

I sit back and turn on the tv,

And feel my stress level decline.

It’s been many weeks,

Since everything went down,

My eyes no longer leak,

I feel stronger all around…

Oh, letting go…

There’s no one in my way now,

Oh letting go….

I’ve stopped asking why…

And even though,

Forever I’ll remember,

Thank god I’m finally…

Letting go.

Oh letting go…

You’re no longer in my way,

Oh letting go.

I’m free and I’m alive,

And I still know,

I’m not completely set,

But the first step

Is letting go.

Thank god I’m finally

Letting go.

16 Forever

Five years old,

An average carefree little girl,

Playing house

With charlotte

In our own world,

She asked me who I want to be,

I said “a girl who is 16”,

And so began the years

Of waiting patiently,

Playing outside,

With Alana in a tree,

Pretending to be 2 magical fairies.

I didn’t have to think really,

When Alana turned and said to me,

“what age, ‘Blossom’, would you like to be?”

“I’d like the be 16 forever,

I’d like to feel my spirit rise,

Pretty dress and shoes,

Makeup and hairdos,

And dancing oh so endlessly…”

Football games,

Very pretty names,

Spiders,

To drive the streets of town,

Shopping malls,

Swimming pools,

So good we have no need for rules,

Flying away,

Seeking higher ground…

Some mornings I feel a little sad,

Lying in bed,

Realizing someday this all has to end…

Thinking back,

Flashing ahead,

Taking for granted everything I have.

Only my best friends could ever understand…

I want to be 16 forever…

I want to feel my spirit rise,

Pretty dress and shoes,

Makeup and hairdos,

And dancing oh so endlessly…

I’ll always be me,

Who else would I be…

But no longer will I be 16…

Or dancing oh so endlessly…

Cross Each Other's Hearts

Baby I know

We’re not together,

But when I dream at night,

You are there…

You are my best friend,

And will be forever.

Sometimes I have to cry,

But you give me a single smile

For every tear.

Maybe we are blue,

Possibly crazy too,

But when we say “I love you”

We cross each other’s hearts.

When we had a kiss,

We weren’t expecting

To feel the way we did,

But now we can’t forget…

We both know it would be too complicated,

Our friendship is too strong.

But maybe we’re just wrong.

We cannot say…

But maybe we are blue,

Possibly crazy too.

But when we say “I love you”,

We cross each others hearts.

We could say

That it’s a waste

Of the talks that it took,

But we won’t start lying now,

I know we never could…

Maybe we are blue,

Possibly crazy too,

But when we say “I love you”,

We cross each other’s hearts…

Maybe we’re crazy too…

“love you”’s just “love you”

except when it’s with you…

No Doubts

I’ve had a change of heart,

I’ve started to believe,

My life’s been pieced apart,

Anything I can achieve.

For now I know for sure,

That I’m unique and rare,

For what I never saw

Was all along right there.

And I….

I never thought I’d be right here,

A perfect night,

Every moment’s dear,

I now know what life’s all about…

Because of this,

I’ve got no doubts.

I’ve had my ups and downs,

With life,

With dreams,

With me…

I can’t just stop and drown,

I have myself to be…

Below stars that are lit,

A newer life’s begun,

It scares me just a bit,

But I won’t turn and run…

Cause I…

I never thought I’d be right here…

A perfect night,

This world is dear…

The sky knows what life’s all about.

Because of this, I’ve got no doubts.

Because of this,

I’ve got no doubts.  

Back To You

Seems like after
All you've done,
I would have learned by now...

Sometimes i question how smart i am,
I'm shocked at how much i allow...

Up and down,
Emotions flaring,
I don't know what more i can do...

Deep down i wonder what i am thinking,
When i keep coming back to you.

And you shout
And i cry
Seeing how deep a hole
You've violently thrown me into...

But i love you so much,
That despite all the scarring,
I keep coming back to you.

I'm living life,
But barely living,
Worried i'll do something wrong.

Being afraid of making you angry
Makes the days and nights seem slow and long...

Bring the wrath,
Bring the pain,
it's what i am accustomed to...

I have no where to turn,
no one else to love me,
So i keep coming back to you.

And you curse,
And i shake,
Knowing none of the love you gave me
Was remotely true...

But i love you so much,
That despite all the tearfall,
I keep coming back to you.

And i'll say that i'm done,
That i'm leaving,
so you no longer can break me in two...

But i love you so much,
that i feel like a liar,
When i keep coming back to you.

You Never Did

Spring comes creeping,

I’m chasing the days…

Memories on my mind,

I’m not sleeping,

But I’m having a dream,

It is much simpler than it seems…

One day, you said you loved me,

I looked into your eyes,

Never in a million years

Did I think that was a lie…

Now the seasons changed,

I’m thinking,

You never let me live,

You can say you love me but I know

You never did.

Looking at you,

How sad I become…

I can almost feel your touch…

Then I change,

And reflect on the past,

It’s amazing how short things last…

One day, you said you loved me,

I took you in my arms,

I don’t know what love means to you,

But to me it shouldn’t cause harm…

Now the sun is up,

I’m thinking,

You never let me live,

Say you love me all you want,

But I know,

You never did.

Move on,

I just move on,

Gotta accept that what’s done is done,

Another day has just begun…

Now the seasons changed,

I’m thinking,

Love should let you live…

And it finally dawned on me,

You never did.

Don't Say It

Don't say you're sorry,
You had five months to utter that phrase,
I'm no longer worried,
We're not gonna talk anymore,

Can't you see
what you're doing to me?

So don't say you love me,
Don't say you love me.

Cause even if that were true,
What do you want me to do?
Forget the past,
If you say that,
I'll go back to you...

And if all of the lies you told,
Still weren't enough to hold me here,
I don't see what good one more would do....

It took me forever
to make myself feel almost like new,

I finally got over
Every single memory of you...

And as soon as i'm fine,
you want to re-enter my life.

So don't say you love me,
Don't say you love me...

Cause even if that were true,
What do you want me to do?
Take you back,
Just like that?
After all you put me through?

And if you really love me so,
I'd rather just not know,
I don't wanna hear those words from you...
Even if it were true.

I finally was happy...
So don't say you love me....